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Updated to add: The use of the term ‘single mother’ is not exactly accurate. If you screw up and get pregnant, don’t screw up even more and bring an innocent child along with you! Divorced moms who escaped abusive marriages with drug/sex/gambling/whatever addicts should not get a free pass from you, either.

If you are a mother and you are collecting child support, you are not a single mother. The rest of us who have to LIVE with your fucked up, emotionally scarred children will PAY you to have a fucking abortion. Second, single mothers are clearly really, really shitty at making life decisions. You both put each other’s happiness above your own. Now divorced mothers, who are a breed of single mothers, MIGHT be a little different, but whenever you approach one, sing this little song in your head: it takes two to tango. Even if it’s TRUE that the husband was a colossal fuck-up, you need to ask yourself what kind of imperceptive moron couldn’t spot that?

The first day seemed like a week and the second day seemed like five days. We're all gonna have so much f--kin' fun we'll need plastic surgery to remove our god-damn smiles.

You know, I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me." Annie Hall (1977)"I know we've only known each other for four weeks and three days, but to me, it seems like nine weeks and five days.

But once you have a child, you cannot take it back. Third, single mothers profoundly misunderstand men. There are few men who are overjoyed to spend their blood, sweat and tears on some other guy’s genetic offspring. A woman who cares so little about her children, her own prospects, and her future husband is NOT going to make a great wife. Oh, and in return, you have to make HER the center of your life. When you meet a divorced single mother, immediately start looking for the flaw. Something that drove another man to pledge his undying love to her, to have and to hold, from this day forth, and then sometime later decide “fuck this shit. Be very cautious around a woman who takes none of the blame for her failed marriage. Take this down: 'I want rustlers, cut-throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperadoes, mugs, pugs, thugs, nit-wits, half-wits, dim-wits, vipers, snipers, con-men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bush-whackers, horn-swagglers, horse-thieves, bull-dykes, train-robbers, bank-robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers, and Methodists! " - "No, now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time." "I went to New York University, and, uhm, I was thrown out of NYU my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final. " - "I want you to round up every vicious criminal and gunslinger in the West. " Blazing Saddles (1974) Play clip (excerpt): - "I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries." - "Is there someone else up there we could talk to? " National Lampoon's Vacation (1983) - "Disturbing the peace." - "Disturbin' the peace? What's the f--kin' charge for getting pushed out of a moving car, huh? This is bulls--t." Beverly Hills Cop (1984)"Excuse me, sir. You may have noticed over the years that I cover a lot of topics that don’t seem to fit squarely in this blog’s mission statement of helping nerds date better.One of the reasons why I write about feminist issues or bad behavior within the geek community is because, frankly, getting better at dating is a holistic system.will provide you with perfect wanking stuff and sex inspiration for your future adult adventures.